In 1 Kings 1, David’s son Adonijah shows us a clear example of how a lot of our lives go.
We have a goal (“I will be king” 1 Kings 1:5),
which is attached to how we view ourselves (“exalted himself” 1 Kings 1:5).
From there, we develop a plan (“he prepared for himself chariots and horsemen, and fifty men . . . he conferred . . . they followed Adonijah and helped him” 1 Kings 1:5-7)
and surround ourselves with enablers (“He conferred with Joab . . . and with Abiathar” 1 Kings 1:7).
Let’s break this down!
1.What we say
Adonijah starts the chapter off with a bold “I will be king.” What is your “I will”? Is it
- I will be healed
- I will have the perfect life
- I will be a teacher
- I will be famous
- I will . . .
Most often, these “I wills” are toxic. Our “I will,” devoid of God’s blessing or input, becomes a declaration of independence.
“I will” shows God the exit door out of our life.
Our “I will” must turn into a humble “Your will.” Because “I will” leads us down a path of destruction, loneliness, and ultimate failure.
2. How we see ourselves
Most of us view ourselves too highly. We are stuck in deep-rutted patterns of either self-exaltation or self-loathing. There’s a huge trend right now to have a negative view of yourself; after all, it just LOOKS better externally than being super proud.
But both are WRONG.
Self-loathing lets the devil stick a foot in the door: surely those thoughts in your head (you aren’t good enough, you’re pathetic, you’ll never be anything, you’re worthless) can’t be of God?
So what are they doing in our heads?
We spend a lot of our lives asking who we are. But, like Moses at the burning bush, we must learn to stop poking holes in ourselves with excuses about being too old, too inarticulate, too incapable, and instead let God tell us who He is (“Tell them I am has sent you!!”).
A correct view of ourselves will flow from having a correct view of God.
3. What we do
We spend our lives trying to get what we want. So, whatever your “I will” is will be driving the car of your life. If you want to get on the Olympic swim team, you better believe you’ll be swapping junk food for 5 am laps at your local pool.
Goals are built on systems. Systems help us achieve our goals. And most often, systems are what keep us away from God.
If God were our goal, our “life systems” would include hours of prayer, devotions, memorizing Scripture, going to church, and loving others.
But instead, our “life systems” are full of self-development (not wrong in and of itself, of course) and even self-indulgence.
Why do you do what you do? Why do you go where you go and hang out with who you hang out? Why do you say what you say and wear what you wear?
It’s all built on your “I will.” And the proper “Your will” will in turn lead to plans that grow us as people and Christians.
4. Who we’re with
We will hang out with people who support our goals, and most likely even have similar goals. We like people who value the same things as we do.
So, again, if you have a hankering to win gold for swimming laps, your best friends will most likely be swim coaches and other swimmers or even athletes in general.
If you have bad goals, those lead to bad people. Adonijah wanted to be king, and guess who gravitated towards him? People who would get what they wanted from Adonijah being king (aka, vengeance).
If your goals are Christlike, you’ll find yourself spending time with Christlike people who can lift you up and speak truth into your life. They’ll invest in your goals and pray for you.
So, if you feel stuck in life, take a look at these four things:
- What are your biggest goals? (They may even be subconscious . . . dig deep!!)
- How do you view yourself? (Again, may be subconscious!!)
- What routines/habits have you developed, and how do they support your goals?
- Who are you spending lots of time with?
Then, from there:
- Adjust your goals. They don’t have to be overtly CHRISTIAN, but they should be sought after prayerfully (ex., “God, do you want me to be an Olympic swimmer?”)
- Adjust your view of self, and focus more on who God is!
- Adjust your goals to support a godly lifestyle. Where are you falling short? How much of your life is spent in God’s Word and with His people?
- Adjust your closest friends. Are they pulling you away from God? Are they encouraging you in a self-destructive lifestyle?
